The Onion’s Video About A 13-Year-Old Drinking Prodigy Is Hysterical

Entertainment, Humor — February 27, 2015 at 3:50 am by

Not only was that video hilarious, it also made me wonder why this isn’t allowed. Alright, so the drinking age is 21. Big whoop. If you’re going to penalize every underage drinker in the country, you might as well lock up every jaywalker while you’re at it. And yeah, drinking at 13 is incredibly dangerous for your health, but have you seen a middle school lunch? As far as I’m concerned, it’s a pick your poison scenario between diabetes or cirrhosis of the liver. So enough with this foolishness already, if we let academic prodigies enroll at universities, we should let drinking prodigies do the same. It’s ridiculous that Doogie Howser and nerds like him are the only ones that get to benefit from their talents. Just like we all read at different levels, we all party at different levels too. Instead of forcing kids like Tyler Morgan to waste their time drinking out of flasks at lame school dances, they should let them spread their wings. Young gifted drinkers need to be in environments that will challenge them and foster their growth. It’s like Whitney Houston used to sing, “I believe the children are our future. Teach them well and let them lead the way.” I’ll drink to that!

via The Onion & Reddit


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