Week 11 and the handicapping/wagering struggle is real, babes. Those in the hole are getting desperate for the dig-out and those on the plus just need to maintain. Time to evoke the yearly Al Pacino…..
As always, we start with The Babes….
Babes (Season 9-14 )
Abstaining this week due to sucking.
Zach (Season 14-16 )
With the season over halfway done, it’s time to get back in the win column. Here’s three games I like this week to do just that.
Toby (Season 17-13)
I’ve been on a nice little run, going 4-2 over the last two weeks. But with the holidays rapidly approaching, now’s not the time for a cold streak. In the eloquent words of the late great Biggie Smalls, “I’m ready to get this paper, G, you with me?”
The Game: Dallas Cowboys (-1) at Miami Dolphins
The Pick: Cowboys
This will be Tony Romo’s first start since Week 2, but I still have the utmost confidence in the fearless gunslinger. Did you see the Major League clip he posted to Twitter earlier this week? He’s a man on a mission, and going to Miami is a perfect matchup for him to begin his playoff push. Romo’s one of the best in the business when it comes to getting it done in enemy territory, as he’s posted a gaudy 38-28-1 ATS career record on the road (Bonesteel). He should also have no problem exploiting Miami’s vulnerable secondary. According to DVOA, the Dolphins are 26th against the pass and they’re the worst team in the NFL when it comes to covering the opposition’s number one receiver (Keefer). Romo and Dez Bryant are going to have a field day, and Jerry Jones is going to thoroughly enjoy the South Beach nightlife.
The Game: Oakland Raiders at Detroit Lions (PK)
The Pick: Raiders
The 4-5 Raiders have dropped two straight and they desperately need a win this Sunday if they’re going to stay in the AFC Wild Card hunt. Luckily for Oakland, they’re playing a Detroit team that’s been one of the bigger disappointments in the league. The Lions admittedly had a big win last week in Green Bay, but that just makes me think they’re going to fall flat on their face this week. After Detroit’s last 29 wins, they’re gone 7-22 ATS the following week (Bell). The Lions are also probably already looking ahead to their annual tradition of boring millions of Americans to tears on Thanksgiving. Since 2005, the Lions are 1-9 ATS the week before Thanksgiving (Bonesteel).
The Game: Kansas City Chiefs (-3.5) at San Diego Chargers
The Pick: Chargers
I feel like people are getting way too excited over the Chiefs’ three-game winning streak. These three wins came against Landry Jones, Matthew Stafford, and Peyton Manning’s corpse. None of those guys are in the same class as Philip Rivers, who’s 2nd in the league in passing yards (3,033), 8th in passing TDs (19), and 8th in quarterback rating (100.7). Plus, Kansas City’s due to lay an egg anyway. Teams that have covered the spread by 20 or more points in two straight games have gone 28-36-1 ATS the following week (Bell). Shout it from the rooftops, Arnie!
Seabass (Season 19-11-1 )
After a 1-2 week I have to look at this NFL schedule for Week 11? Good gravy, this is some ugly and hideous stuff. These teams, these lines, it looks like one big pile of chicken shit. Time to turn chicken shit into chicken salad. Time for chicken dinner, babes…
Game: Colts @ Falcons (-5) Pick: Colts
The Colts stink and the Falcons are overrated. So what to do? Take the points. Hasselbeck is a cagey old pro and the Colts should hang on the road with the ever under-inspiring Falcons….the wind beneath Atlanta’s wings……
Game: Broncos (-1) @ Bears Pick: Broncos
Classic NFL wagering baloney here. The Broncos are playing like shit lately. The Bears are suddenly drubbing opponents. The back up QB has entered the season for Denver. The Bears are at home. All signs point to Chicago. Which means the line is an overlay and the Broncos will destroy the Bears. Broncos D does a 180 and gets back on track to lead the Orange and Blue to victory. Yeah Brock, bro, brah, bro!!!!!
Game: Bucs @ Eagles (-5.5) Pick: Bucs
Mark Sanchez giving almost six points? Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
Good luck to all!