My Boy Testudo Is Comfortably Resting After Being On Fire

Featured, News — December 18, 2013 at 9:29 pm by

If you know about Testudo then you know about being a Terp.  If you don’t know, then you probably don’t give a crap that he was “accidentally” set on fire last night. (A candle and a lampshade are apparently to blame.) But Testudo was engulfed in flames and I am happy to report that he is good as new after a fire extinguishing and a power washing.  So go ahead Terps, rub that beautiful turtle’s nose and leave those pieces of cold pizza, dildos, old electronics, and cigars as offerings.   A mascot that is engulfed in flames and is unchanged and unfazed only hours later.  Better fear that turtle babes.  BTW, if it turns out that some turd from Johns’ Hopkins did this I will be driving up and down Charles Street with dozens of rotten eggs looking for targets.

All good.  Now if only the basketball team can catch fire.  (Metaphorically of course.)

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