This past Saturday night, 23-year-old Kyle Yeomans hit up Derriere’s Gentlemen’s Club in Myrtle Beach to partake in one of America’s greatest pastimes: getting bombed and staring at titties. Everything was going fine for Yeomans, as he would later tell police officers that his intoxication level was “an 11 out of 10.” But the night took a turn for the worse when a certain stripper started annoying him. She kept trying to talk to him and wouldn’t leave him alone, so Yeomans decided to say the one thing that you should NEVER say to a stripper. From The Smoking Gun:
In response to being annoyed, Yeomans “told the dancer that she should go to the gym and lose weight.” The stripper, Yeomans said, was a white female with long black hair. He estimated that she weighed between 115-120 pounds, and was no more than 25 years old.
Yeomans also reported that his attacker had “a muffin top.”
After receiving Yeomans’s unsolicited fitness advice, the stripper allegedly “reached off the stage and struck him 4 times in the face,” police noted. Yeomans said he was then dragged out of Derriere’s by bouncers who were “unnecessarily rough with him.”
Yeomans, who waited about 17 hours to report the incident, had injuries on his face “consistent with his statement of being struck,” cops reported. Yeomans said that the injuries were caused by the stripper who “was hitting him while wearing a ring.”
I’ve actually been to Derriere’s before, and if my hazy memories of the trip are correct, Yeomans should be thanking his lucky stars that he got off so easy. It’s a dumpy fully nude strip joint with metal detectors and BYOB, so I’m honestly surprised that he didn’t get beaten to death in the parking lot for mouthing off like that. Southern hospitality only goes so far when you insult ladies willing to bare their snatch for singles.