Man Stabbed In Fallston For Eating Another Man’s Meatball

Humor, News — September 6, 2014 at 7:31 pm by

The Baltimore Sun – A dispute between two employees of a Fallston business over a meatball during lunch led to a stabbing Thursday, the Harford County Sheriff’s Office said. Deputies were called to the business in the 2300 block of Belair Road around 11:10 a.m., where they learned there had been an altercation over one employee eating the other’s meatball from his lunch, Sheriff’s Office spokesperson Cristie Kahler said. An argument ensued and the employee who had eaten the meatball was stabbed in the arm by the employee whose lunch he had taken the meatball from, Kahler said. The assailant, a 31-year-old Edgewood man, fled the scene. The victim, a 36-year-old Aberdeen man, was taken to a local hospital and later discharged. Charges are pending, Kahler said. 

This is a tough one. Violence is never the answer, but we’re not talking about some carrot sticks or a fruit cup here, we’re talking about a meatball. A hearty, delicious meatball. That guy was probably looking forward to that meatball all day while busting his hump at work. Just licking his lips, staring at the clock, and counting down the minutes till his lunch break. The one thing that he enjoys during his shitty work day, this prick goes and ruins it. Stabbing him was clearly wrong, but this guy was practically asking for it by pulling a stunt like that. I think that we should leave the cops out of it, and solve this problem like gentlemen. I propose that the thief buys a tray of meatballs, the stabber apologizes for trying to murder him, they shake hands, and they both go to town on the meatballs together. Now that’s a feel good story that everyone would love, especially the old lady from The Wedding Singer.

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