Man Dressed As Teletubby Breaks Into Home, Steals Chinese Food, Leaves

Humor, News — October 30, 2014 at 5:36 pm by

Terez S. Owens Jr., 20, broke into a friends’ home early Sunday morning in Bethlehem, Pennsylvania dressed as the yellow Teletubby, Laa-Laa. The Lehigh University student damaged a door to enter the house then committed one of the most savage crimes in the history of theft, friendship, and fashion. Lehigh Valley Live reported that, “He went into the victims’ refrigerator and dumped Chinese food into a ‘man purse’ before leaving.” Police were able to track Owens down, and he’s been charged with criminal mischief and disorderly conduct.

Fuck those weak ass charges. Give this monster the chair! If this guy broke into a house as a Teletubby and stole some money and other valuables, I’d think that he was just your run-of-the-mill, down-on-his-luck, nutjob criminal. But stealing Chinese food from your own friend is some diabolical shit. It’s the ultimate act of betrayal. Et tu, Laa-Laa? 


To top it all off, this creep just had to stash the goods in a man purse. What’s wrong, Terez, was your fanny pack at the cleaners? Putting delicious Chinese food in a man purse is so disrespectful it’s unreal. It’s like not taking your hat off during the Star-Spangled Banner. So the next time you decide to stab a friend in the back, Terez, leave the Teletubby costume at home and bring some fucking Tupperware, you psychopath.

via Gawker & Lehigh Valley Live
Laa-Laa pic: Imgur

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