Love The Creativity Of This Guy Who Assaulted His Mother With Potato Salad

News — August 27, 2015 at 11:25 pm by

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ABC7– A Bradenton man has been arrested after a confrontation with his mother left the poor woman covered in spit and potato salad.

According to a probable cause affidavit produced by the Manatee County Sheriff’s Office, 34-year-old Jonathan Joshua Smith got into a fight with his mother on Saturday, right as she was preparing to eat dinner.

According to the report, the responding officer arrived to find the mother “emotional and crying,” and with “food all over her and her hair.” She told the officer that she had just sat down to eat in the living room, when her son came home and began yelling at her. Smith then grabbed a handful of potato salad and threw it at her, hitting her right in the face.

Smith continued throwing food at his mother as she repeatedly asked him to stop. The mother then attempted to leave the house, at which point police allege he pushed her to the floor, spit on her, and then began to drag her by her leg.

The mother finally threatened to call the police, which got Smith’s attention. He ceased his assault, and fled the scene on a bicycle, only to be picked up soon thereafter by the arresting officer.

 

 

Yup, I’m all about the potato salad method for fighting. No one really gets hurt, but nothing says you mean business like tossing a handful of mayo and taters in someone’s face. You’re a thirty-four year old who probably still lives at home and you’re┬ástill having petty fights with your mom about what’s been cooked for dinner? Can’t blame you. Toss some of that shit in her face. Let her know you still run that house. That’s your fuckin house. You’re the man. She knows you don’t like potato salad, what the hell was she thinking? Egg salad or GTFO. Make sure she makes your bed in the morning too.

Moms, they just don’t get it sometimes.

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