Home Intruder Couldn’t Resist Seductive Lure Of Teddy Bear

Humor, News — October 13, 2014 at 9:57 am by

A British man thought he had it all figured out, basically a textbook robbery. Paul Mountain of Darwen, Lancashire, broke into a shed in the town when he was essentially seduced by a stuffed teddy bear. Some may call this guy a freak, but we don’t know where his head was at that day. Paul’s adrenaline was probably through the roof during the B&E, and the poor bear was just in the wrong place at the wrong time. Sometimes being a lovable teddy bear is just a curse.

Maybe Paul could have pulled of this burglary, but he left behind something very important. Mountain’s DNA was matched with samples left in the stuffed toy. He had his fun with the bear, and left it behind like he never even knew the bear. The teddy bear was found “among the wreckage” he left behind.

bear

Like any red-blooded male, Paul Mountain reached for any excuse he could find. He claims he only defiled the bear because he was crashing, like super hard. According to the prosecutor, the burglar “told officers he was coming down off amphetamine and felt overwhelming need for sexual relief.” Now it all makes sense.

via DMail

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