Articles by: Zach

Senior Citizen Crashed Car Into His Own Pool Because He’s Old As Shit

Personally I plan on having someone murder me before I get to be old enough to where I’m driving my car into my pool. Why? Because being old sounds just […]

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by / on August 18, 2014 at 1:46 am / in News

Magician Asks Cop To Buy His Weed. What Happens Next Is Awesome

A lot of prank videos that are going viral lately are totally fake, and you can usually tell which ones are. But no doubt this video is real. Not only […]

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by / on August 16, 2014 at 2:46 pm / in Humor

Brilliant Chen Not Enough; O’s Lose 2-1 in 11, After Matusz Surrenders Walk-Off Homer

Well, you can’t win ’em all. This loss felt rough though, and leaves me with a bad taste in my mouth. Coming in to this game, the Orioles were red […]

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by / on August 15, 2014 at 11:21 pm / in Sports and Bets

Brittney Griner Proposes To Fellow WNBA Star Glory Johnson. Bigger Story Than Michael Sam?

In the same year Michael Sam came out of the closet as a homosexual prior to being drafted by the St. Louis Rams in the seventh round of the NFL […]

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by / on August 15, 2014 at 8:43 pm / in Sports and Bets

Steve Smith Loves To ‘Play Like A Raven.’ Calls It The ‘Bully Way.’

God, I freaking love Steve Smith. All reports say he’s totally bought into the winning system we have here in Baltimore. The “bully” way. “When I look in the defensive […]

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by / on August 15, 2014 at 12:31 pm / in Sports and Bets

Somebody Please Pay This Guy’s $5 Bail For Stealing Cookies

A man named Lucky Crowder is stuck in jail in Albuquerque, New Mexico for the crime of stealing cookies. His bail is set at 5 American dollars, but no one […]

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by / on August 15, 2014 at 11:07 am / in News

Update: I-895 Closed Today After Tractor Trailor Overturned, Blocking All Northbound Lanes

Today at 2:30 pm, a tractor Trailor crashed, and lies on its side, on I-895. The big rig covers all lanes on 895 North, just past the Harbor Tunnel. As […]

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by / on August 14, 2014 at 4:01 pm / in News

ICYMI: Lil Wayne Live On Sportcenter Freestyle Raps To Theme Song

In case you missed it this morning on Sportscenter, Lil Wayne got on to promote his new album Tha Carter V, and rapped to the show’s theme song. It was […]

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by / on August 14, 2014 at 2:52 pm / in Sports and Bets

Woman Allegedly Trespasses In Family’s Garden, Engages In Sex Act With Lawn Furniture

A 33 year-old drunk woman in Seattle has been accused of sneaking into a nice little family’s garden, and getting it on with their garden furniture. She allegedly pulled up […]

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by / on August 14, 2014 at 1:50 pm / in News

What Does Your Phone Choice Say About Your Sexting Game? Ground Breaking Stuff Here.

Well the good people at Fox News revealed some information found from a survey done by Retina-X Studios, which is an activity monitoring company. In this case, specifically monitoring phone […]

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by / on August 13, 2014 at 11:40 pm / in News

There’s A Bikini Clad Pole Dancer On The Ocean City Boardwalk

Nothing says vacation like pole dancers and bikinis. A woman has been dressed in a bikini, taking a portable stripper pole around the boardwalk in Ocean City, Maryland, and she’s […]

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by / on August 13, 2014 at 11:52 am / in Entertainment, News

Watch Adam Jones And A Rescue Dog Eat A Pie Together, Doggy Style

Adam Jones of the Baltimore Orioles is known for his love of pie-ing teammates in the face following a win. This time, to bring awareness to the Baltimore Animal Rescue […]

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by / on August 12, 2014 at 11:08 pm / in Sports and Bets

Buck Says He Wants To Give Jeter Signed Picture Of Jeffery Maier “Home Run”

Buck’s the fucking man. Every team is pretty much obligated to give Derek Jeter a going away present, for God knows what reason, and Buck came up with a little […]

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by / on August 12, 2014 at 1:57 pm / in Sports and Bets

Manny Machado In Post Game Interview Talks About Injury

Courtesy of MASN, here’s Manny talking after the game about his injury. From all of us in Birdland, get well soon.  

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by / on August 12, 2014 at 12:45 am / in Sports and Bets

In Latest Creepy Wal-Mart Story, Registered Sex Offender Allegedly Has A Thing For Under-Skirt Photography

You know, just when you think Wal-Mart couldn’t get any weirder, a 50-year-old registered sex offender was allegedly using his cell phone to take pictures up a woman’s skirt while […]

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by / on August 11, 2014 at 10:15 pm / in News

Bestiality Is Not My Thing, But Church Leader Jerald Hill Might Like It

In the town of Columbia, Missouri, 56 year-old pervert Jerald Hill got arrested for allegedly trying to meet up with a man who was offering up a dog ready for […]

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by / on August 10, 2014 at 3:25 pm / in News