Articles by: Zach

Couple Allegedly Murdered Two People, But Couldn’t Climax While Having Sex On Their Dead Bodies

There’s nothing worse than when you’re making sweet love on a couple dead bodies and can’t bust a nut. Sweethearts Alisa Massaro and Joshua Miner have been accused of murdering two […]

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by / on September 27, 2014 at 12:07 pm / in Humor, News

Orioles Lose To Jays, Now Locked In To 2-Seed; Plus, Tillman’s A True Ace

Chris Tillman made his final start of the year, in which he gave up more than three earned runs for the first time since June 5. What an incredible season […]

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by / on September 27, 2014 at 12:20 am / in Sports and Bets

New Dumb And Dumber To Trailer Out

I’m really afraid of how bad this movie is going to be. I hope so much that I’m wrong.

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by / on September 26, 2014 at 2:27 am / in Humor

Man Tries To Cross Canadian Border With 51 Live Turtles Strapped To His Body

Kai Xu apparently had no problem fitting 51 live turtles in his sweatpants to sneak them across the Canadian border, and I have no problem with him bringing said turtles on […]

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by / on September 26, 2014 at 1:53 am / in News

Conan Gives You His Take On The IPhone 6 And Erectile Dysfunction

Pretty solid watch. There’s nothing I love more than my cell phone and my boner. Best of both worlds. via TeamCoCo

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by / on September 26, 2014 at 1:04 am / in Humor

Nick Markakis Homers During Derek Jeter Chant To Kill Everyone In New York’s Vibe

Markakis turned what was meant to be a legendary final role call into something we Oriole fans can smirk at. I have all the “Re2pect” (so lame) in the world for […]

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by / on September 26, 2014 at 12:53 am / in Sports and Bets

Fisherman In Kayak Is Scared Shitless When Shark Breaches Water And Eats His Fish

Ok, first of all, let’s just point out that this guy’s a total fuck-tard for going out into the ocean solo and fishing from a kayak. The shark was probably […]

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by / on September 25, 2014 at 8:14 pm / in Outdoors

Family In Western PA Names Their Cow After Ben Roethlisberger Because Of ‘7’ On Face

A lovely family living on a farm in western Pennsylvania are big Steelers fans, and one of their cows recently birthed a calf with a white ‘7’ imprinted on its […]

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by / on September 25, 2014 at 7:30 pm / in Sports and Bets

Elderly Women In West Baltimore Get In Epic Fight Over A Pack Of Smokes

These ladies know what’s important in life, and that’s a good pack of smokes. Obviously the beating with a cane of a fellow old woman was necessary, because that shows […]

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by / on September 25, 2014 at 12:52 pm / in Entertainment

Derek Jeter Could Owe $16,000 For Receiving All His Gifts

Because Yankee legend Derek Jeter has been given all these farewell gifts, which are estimated to be valued at around $32,000, he now may be required to pay up to 16 G’s […]

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by / on September 24, 2014 at 2:14 pm / in Sports and Bets

Jackass Spam Texter Gets Trolled Back, And It’s Incredible

    Well, well, well, how the tables have turned… via ED

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by / on September 24, 2014 at 1:28 pm / in Humor

Ladies At FIU Beware, There’s A Man Strolling Around Grabbing Ass

What a great way to make a name for yourself around campus. Stroll up on your bike, grab a butt cheek or two, and Lance Armstrong the fuck out of […]

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by / on September 24, 2014 at 12:35 pm / in Humor

Woman Tries To Sneak Past JFK Airport TSA With Guns, Ammo, And 33 Pounds Of Weed

Nyesha McPherson was attempting to fly out of JFK airport to go to Barbados, with a pair of guns, a lot of ammo, and a whole bunch of weed. But […]

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by / on September 23, 2014 at 2:13 am / in News

‘Game Of Thrones’ Nerd Stabs Home Intruder With A Medieval Spear

“I am a Christian man and I don’t want to take life, however I want to make sure that he understands that his life was mine to take. I let […]

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by / on September 23, 2014 at 12:30 am / in Humor, News

Brazilians Find HUGE Anaconda In River And Harass It

What a fucking dumbass. This video literally will make your heart race. I don’t speak whatever language these folks were babbling on in, but I can tell this man was […]

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by / on September 22, 2014 at 6:56 pm / in Outdoors

A Mom And Two Teens Accused Of Drawing 100-Yard Penis In High School Football Field

This mom is not a good parent, she’s a great parent. A 50-year-old woman and two teens are suspected of using weed killer to draw a huge-ass dick in the […]

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by / on September 22, 2014 at 5:44 pm / in Humor, Sports and Bets