After Weeks Of Hearing Xmas Music, I’ve Decided Christmas In Hollis Is The Greatest Carol Of All Time.

Entertainment — December 26, 2014 at 9:03 pm by

I don’t care what anybody says, for the most part, Christmas music sucks.  And if you work in a place that deals with the general public, you’ve been listening to these jingle-jangle, deck the balls classics for the better part of a month.  It doesn’t end with Christmas being over, either.  Just today, the day after Christmas, I was cashing in a well-received gift card for some new footwear.  The Christmas carols were blasting overhead and the employees of the shopping mega-troplis I was at looked damn near catatonic from the seasonal sounds.  You could tell that they all felt like they had been getting ear-banged by an elf on the shelf for six straight weeks.  It was an unmitigated disaster.

As I was driving home from this shopping trip, it suddenly dawned on me that of all the Christmas music I had heard this season, I hadn’t heard the greatest Christmas Carol of all time.  Not even once.  I hadn’t heard Christmas In Hollis by Run DMC. And that’s a shame, because it’s definitely the greatest Christmas carol of all time.  Run, DMC, and Jam Master Jay break down what Christmas is all about.  Chicken and collard greens, family, and cold hard cash.  So take your Silent Nights, and your First Noels, and your Away In The Mangers, and stick ’em in that cardboard box with the Christmas tree and shove ’em in the attic til next year.  I’ll be jammin’ this Run DMC classic until Memorial Day, babes.  And by the way, if this song had been playing in the malls and shopping hell-holes of the season for the last month, everybody would have been all the better for it…

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